A Thanksgiving Tradition of Gratitude
As we approach Thanksgiving, I’m sharing this a bit earlier in the week, knowing that it’s not too late to start a new tradition. A simple gesture, like gratitude napkins, can bring meaning to your holiday. Order some dinner napkins and Sharpies today—this may be the year your family begins a tradition you’ll treasure forever.
Three years ago, Thanksgiving was marked by uncertainty. My loved one had entered yet another treatment program—one in a long string of attempts at recovery. With no access to technology due to a blackout period, the day felt especially heavy.
Thanksgiving has always been the one holiday where I go all out: cooking for hours, welcoming family and friends, and embracing our favorite traditions. Our morning begins with a bowling outing for everyone except a dear friend who stays to keep me company. By the afternoon, we gather around a table overflowing with appetizers, lasagna as the first course, and an over-the-top dinner featuring turkey, ham, countless sides, and far too many desserts.
That Thanksgiving, I worked hard to create a sense of normalcy for my 16-year-old daughter, despite the empty seat at our table and the ache in my heart. We rallied as a family, even playing our annual game of Pictionary, where our competitive spirits came alive. But even during those moments of laughter, my thoughts drifted to my loved one—wondering where he was and how he was spending his day.
Later that evening, after everyone had gone home, an email came through using technology meant for tutoring. It felt like an SOS:"Everything isn’t going too great… Someone stole my drink, spit and peed on my slippers, and tried to start a fight. I hate it here right now."
Soon after, I received a call from an unknown number. He’d borrowed a phone to tell me how isolated and hurt he felt. I couldn’t fix it, and the weight of his pain lingered long after our brief conversation ended.
The holidays that followed gradually improved. Recovery didn’t come immediately, but each Thanksgiving since has brought more peace and healing. Our Thanksgivings have taken on a new, deeper meaning.
In 2022, we started a simple tradition that has become my favorite part of the day, gratitude napkins. I purchased large white dinner napkins and Sharpies. That first year, everyone wrote down what they were thankful for. Each Thanksgiving since, I’ve set the table with the same napkins, and we’ve added to them year after year.
Some napkins are rich with memories, while others belong to newer guests. One year, a guest insisted on burning her napkin after a breakup—a bittersweet moment that became part of the tradition.
My loved one’s gratitude napkins reflect his journey:
2022: "I am thankful for being alive, sober, and with my loved ones."
2023: "I am thankful for the support of my friends and family, building a future for young adolescents in recovery."
This simple ritual has become a cherished part of our holiday—a chance to pause, reflect, and celebrate growth.
As you prepare for Thanksgiving, may your home be filled with warmth, your table with love, and your heart with gratitude for both the big and small moments. Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
